18,192 notes
i-think-i-m-adorable tentennantism
mozzarella firefox my mom (via dutchster)
81,566 notes
notmusa sandbanana
Anonymous: hello son

hey ambiguous parent person 

0 notes

woodmeat:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

onkay:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

bitches ain’t even 5’5” demandin a 6’3” nigga like “pick someone your own size” ain’t a thing

Im 5’2” and my ex is 6’4” step off

your ex already did

image

34,795 notes
tsunamiwavesurfing vinnking

ruinedchildhood:

Mom: Home in 5 minutes, hope you’ve taken the chicken out of the freezer

Me: image

72,986 notes
ruinedchildhood dolphzigglers
neogohann sphinxvalley
467,112 notes
-everdeen what-is-this-i-dont-even
me n my ogre bf

bellpincher:

me: babe come over

bf: i can’t theres fucking ropes all over the place

me: my parents are out

bf: image

30,130 notes
bellpincher vapore0n

clestroying:

turning 12 like

image

26,533 notes
clestroying fuckmakingacleverdomainname
super7ana sethmarierollins

esexist:

when people say “i love you” i always say “i love you more” because life is a competition and i must win

147,737 notes
esexist arcticlizards
kinggjayysshit:

heropirate:

Bob scrubbin’ your blog.

Thanks bob
heropirate basicnuganomics
tony-and-loki:

artbymoga:

sparklefairydust:

askthegrandhighboob:

fullofsinfullust:

zzazu:

trenzalord:

geometricdeathtrap:

pugsies:

PLEASE READ. WILL NOT HURT TO AND FORWARD. Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the rubbish, but you’ll never make it!!!
If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is boiling hot as well. Don’t pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the gutter, etc. Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little water. A small piece of foil. Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!! No fingers left and other serious effects to your face, eyes, etc. Please ensure that everyone that may not have email access are also informed of this. 
Snopes confirms.

I’ve dealt with these before. If you find one:
Do not touch it
Do not touch it
Clear the area around it. It will explode on its own in time.
Once it explodes, do not make contact with the liquid inside. If needed, flush it away with large amounts of water.
Do not try to detonate it. You’ll probably be disfigured.
I’ve seen what these can do. The acidic liquid inside can strip the paint off a car.

when i visited vancouver these were everywhere. it’s not a fucking joke they’re actually scary

Just a reminder that there are awful shitty people out there doing awful shitty things to everyone else

there was a bunch of these at disneyland

i found one in my back yard, when i let my dogs out, i pulled them back inside, took my cousins bb shotgun and shot it from a safe distance (i was in my house and shot from the screen door. When it went off, my family and neighbors came running to see if everything was ok. I told them what happened and to watch out for them. 
These things are not a joke! When we went to check the damage there was a fucking hole in the ground. The dirt in my yard is like CLAY.
This shit is bad news

PLEASE DON’T BE AN ASSHAT. PLEASE DON’T LEAVE BOMBS IN PEOPLE’S YARDS.

hoLY FUCKING SHIT ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? JESUS CHRIST! Please followers keep this in mind and do not touch those things. Fuck. I can’t believe that something like that even exists…

do what the bb gun person did except if the cops come video tape it so they know that you didn’t do it on purpose
pugsies bitterboob
432,212 notes
ghoststhatweknew owlerz
miaouler:

nanokorg:

tachimukais:

one person visiting from the past

WINDOWS VISTA MAY BE AN OLD SYSTEM BUT ARE YOU NOT NOTICING THE TIME TRAVELER WHO IS 1,992 VERSIONS AHEAD OF THE CURRENT OS WTF?

son i have news for you
petpup macaroniandbitchplease